When developing your leadership style, you no doubt have examples of leaders in mind you do and do not admire. But what about the other messages we receive–often unconsciously–about what leaders do and do not do? Studying the example set by those who came before you is not the only homework you have to complete on your leadership journey. It will also be important to explore, and at times, reject, the perceptions you hold about what a leader is and does in order to show up as your authentic self and create the kind of business where you want to work.
I recently sat down with Donnie Boivin, CEO of Success Champion Networking and Founder of Badass Business Summit. We talked about many things, including how to show up as your authentic self. Having nearly lost everything when he first started his own business, Donnie’s commitment to being boldly himself is not only a strength, it’s a core element of his brand. Here are 3 lessons from our conversation:
- Be authentically you to find your audience.
- Excuses are not the same as reasons.
- Spend time truly getting to know yourself and your emotions.
Lesson #1: Be authentically you!
Early on in Donnie’s career as a business owner, he was invited to speak at a podcaster expo. Having been only a year out of the corporate world, he wore pre-blue jeans and baseball caps. Right before he went on stage, the person who invited him grabbed him by the arm and said, “Don’t go full Donnie.” What he meant was, don’t upstage me. At that moment, Donnie had a choice to make: let this person dim his star or be his full self. He chose the latter. Walking on stage, he exclaimed: Where the fuck are all my badasses at,” and the audience erupted.
I love this story because it reminds us of the importance of not being weighed down by external pressures to conform. For Donnie, this moment also taught him two important things: First, that he could safely show up as himself because the biggest risk would be a handful of folks who were offended. Second, when you’re truly yourself, you’ll always find your people.
Lesson #2: Excuses are not reasons.
Entrepreneurship is earned. You cannot reap the benefits of being an entrepreneur if you don’t have money in the bank to pay the bills. When Donnie had hit rock bottom, he knew he no longer had the luxury of giving excuses for not doing the hard work to move things forward. He had to look at the reasons and fix them.
Reasons, I like to say, result from predictable conditions: if I’m going to an appointment around rush hour, I know with certainty traffic is going to be rough. If I don’t leave early enough to be on time, then I made a mistake, and that is the reason I am late. Similarly, if the market is in a downturn, I can point to that as the reason sales are also down. Excuses don’t provide clarity around cause and effect. Instead, they shift blame, are noncommittal, and keep us rooted in unhelpful patterns. To make a move from entrepreneur to CEO, to grow your business, to achieve your goals, you must be willing to get uncomfortable and confront the reasons why you aren’t making progress with solutions that do.
Lesson #3: Get to know yourself!
We often talk on Best Places to Lead about the importance of self-reflection for leaders. One thing that gets rushed past in these conversations, though, is how you get to a place where you know yourself well enough to be reflective. It is so important to understand the emotions tied to our reactions and where they come from.
Donnie also suggests trying this daily activity. Look in the mirror and say, “I’m proud of you.” Then, pay attention to the things that come up that you aren’t so proud of: maybe in how you’ve been showing up as a spouse or a parent or the way you have been handling yourself in meetings. Whatever it is, you will know that because you aren’t proud of it, that’s the thing to go work on next. And if that doesn’t provide the perspective you’re looking for, you can always read one of my favorite books: How to Win Friends and Influence People.
To learn more from Donnie about authentic leadership, make sure to check out the full episode!
About Best Places to Lead
Your company has the potential to be great. The leader’s responsibility is to unlock that potential – or doom it to mediocrity.
On the LIVE Best Places to Lead show, you’ll learn the hard-fought lessons from the front lines earned by business leaders who have already had their teeth bashed in and lived to tell about it. We’ll share the tips, tricks, mindsets, and frameworks that allow great leaders to lead differently.
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